Five days backwards

For the last 6 days I have not had access to the internet.  Given that our society relies on internet much like we do air or water, it took awhile to adjust.  I kept my memories and experiences locked in a tight vault, hoping that they would surface again.  Surface like a wave that takes me from complacency to action. 
Now I am challenged with going backwards 5 days and reliving the incredible, and sometimes surreal experiences that entered my reality, and some that will never leave my heart.
On Sunday we arrived in San Rafael del Sur to begin our journey with the family who had anticipated our arrival for a very long time.  We boarded the bus and headed to La Gallina where our building would begin.  We met our first family and were invited into their home.  Their home.  This was not a house.  Having seen abject poverty in El Salvador for my 2010 build, I thought myself prepared for what I was to witness.  I was not prepared.  I was assaulted again by the disparity that exists in our world.  My throat closed, and my heart ached as I was shown around the 10x20 area.  Dirt floors, tin walls, no furniture, no water, no beds....it was surreal. The most emotional moment came when Morgan quickly left the home, and headed away from the group.  She could not contain her pain, and the tears flowed. Even the most experienced builders and strong members of the team were affected by her reaction.  It was a moment that we will all remember.  It was a moment that will resonate with her, and will always remain with me.
The next home was my build.  The family consisted of Rosa, Rafael, Fernando (9), Franci (7) and Flaviola (5).  They will remain with me always.

For the last 3 years Chris and I have been supported and encouraged by so many friends, family and strangers.  People who believed in our efforts,

Reflections

This time last year I was preparing for my first house build in a developing country.  I had no expectations, and I had a sense of calm I have never experienced prior to any trip.  I was sad to leave my girls behind, but I knew they were in good hands, and their excitement for me was palpable.  I had a sense that what I learned on this trip would make me a better Mother, better friend, better leader.  I had no idea how much of that would come to fruition.  I could not have imagined how the people I would meet would alter my perception of life, and dramatically change how I would continue to live my life.  El Salvador took me completely out of my comfort zone...my North American realism, and immersed me in a community who taught me humility, gratitude and simple joy.
Simple joy.  The joy of meeting a 7-year old girl who would become my shadow.  A girl who put her face inches from mine to figure out these blue eyes of mine.  A girl who wore a clean dress every day, complete with matching ribbon in her dark curly hair.  A girl who tried to be so nonchalant about her interest in me, but failed miserably.  A girl who I will never forget.
Simple joy.  The joy of working side by side with like-minded people who never complained, who laughed effortlessly and who never faltered.  The inspiration of working with people who left their lives in Canada behind, however briefly, to give a family a home.
Simple joy.  Sweating in places I had no idea I could sweat from, and knowing everyone else was too. A cold beer after a day working harder than I have ever worked in my life.
Simple joy.  Giving a small boy (I called him "warrior boy") my lunch, because I knew the pigeon he shot with his sling-shot was dinner.
Simple joy.  Coming home to the house I always thought was too small and only seeing a mansion.

In 10 days I leave for Nicaragua.  I have a sense of what lies before us.  I know the back breaking work that waits for us, and the long days under the merciless sun.  I also know I will fall in love.  More children will enter my heart, and their gift to me will be greater than anything I could possibly give to them.

I look forward to sharing this with my 17-year old daughter.  I hope this graduation gift is something she will never forget.  I know I will never forget sharing it with her.  I am truly blessed.

To those who have helped us make this journey with your encouragement and generosity, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.  I hope you will see through my eyes and words the great gift you have bestowed on two families in Nicaragua.

Peace and love.  Always.